How can I help
my child to
succeed?
Parent challenges
Many children act out at home when they are feeling overwhelmed or not confident that they can complete the tasks required of them. While they show little signs of stress or struggle at school, they often release these feelings at home with loved ones. Showing understanding, compassion and encouragement to keep going is a tricky balance to master and many parents find this initially challenging themselves.
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Please see below some behaviours and possible solutions that past parents have utilised and found some success with. Every parent/child relationship is different, and so every strategy that parents employ is different. Please be prepared that some tough love is going to be needed with your child at some point during that AG Class program. It always helps to understand the AG approach, so please feel free to familiarise yourself with how we are challenging your child.
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Praise
Praise is a wonderful tool to motivate and encourage children to take on new challenges when you used correctly. For more information please read our praise page here.
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Signs they are feeling overwhelmed
Every child reacts differently when they are overwhelmed but there are some general signs that you can look for. The main process here is that the children will look for any excuse that they feel makes it okay to feel overwhelmed and also helps them to escape the situation they perceive to be difficult. They are afraid to risk effort and they start to play below the line.
Your children are very savvy when it comes to task avoidance! They may display some, all or any technique they have found to be successful in the past when they are scared to risk effort into something that they find challenging.
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Please persevere with them to overcome these feelings and help them to experience success! See our 4 tips to helping below and also feel free to download Mrs G's tips to success (PDF 147KB) and display it in your home.
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Below are some examples of just some of the task avoidance strategies that children use and some possible truths as to what is really happening. Please note that this is not always what is occurring, but it is fairly common displays of behaviour for children in the early stages of the program.
It's too easy ... It's too hard
means ...
I don't know how to do this
Your children know from past experience that if they tell people that the work is "too easy" that they often get to skip the work altogether!
So if your child tells you that the AG Class work is too easy, check their level of understanding and ability to produce the work at that level before approaching the teacher to negotiate around the skill.
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Children will often use the excuse it's "too hard" to try and avoid tasks or receive heavy handed help from parents.
It is a tricky balance to strike but it is important that you encourage your child to keep trying. The trick here is to only show them the next step and encourage and praise their effort. them to push on.
I'm bored
means
I'm scared to take a risk
This is very typical of a child that find the task challenging but doesn't want to admit that they are feeling overwhelmed. They are often scared to risk effort incase they do not succeed.
They will complain that the work is 'boring' and they don't like it as an excuse for not doing or completing the work. By complaining that something is boring, your child is demonstrating a fixed mindset.
It is important to refocus your child on applying effort here and giving new opportunities a chance. You never know what you may end up liking of loving if you have an open attitude.
I don't want to go because ...
means
I don't want to face the challenge
It is important to refocus your child on applying effort here and giving new opportunities a chance.
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This is a similar scenario to"I'm bored". Referring to Mrs G's tips to success (PDF 147KB) may be helpful as well as working through a combination of the 4 tips to help.
In this situation, your child is playing below the line by creating any excuse they deem suitable to avoid the class and demonstrating a fixed mindset.
You never know what you may end up liking of loving if you have an open attitude.
4 possible tips to help
There are many more tips to help your child but these are a great starting point. Feel free to use one or all of these tips as you need. Remember that everyone is different and so different methods work for different people. Mrs G's tips to success (PDF 147KB) are also a helpful resource to refer to.
Tip 1
LISTEN to your child's worries and concerns
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TALK to them about how they are feeling now won't last forever
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Tip 2
ENCOURAGE them to try looking at it from a different angle
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ATTACK the problem from another angle - see if you can help them to change their approach
Tip 3
PRAISE their effort - rather than the work they accomplished
BREAK the task down into smaller, more achievable tasks
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Tip 4
REMIND them of the feeling that they are going to have once they accomplish the task
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HELP them to remember that challenge and learning are not always easy
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